Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Thirty-four felonies and never served a day,
A jury said "sexual abuse," he said "fake,"
Caught on a hot mic braggin' where he likes to grab,
Eighty-three million dollars for runnin' his gab.
Fifteen hundred pardons on day number one
For the crowd that stormed the Capitol — says "no harm done,"
Seventeen inspectors general out the door,
Then: "Epstein list? Never heard of it before."
[Chorus]
It's a gold-plated dumpster fire burnin' on the lawn,
A ballroom where the East Wing was, Rose Garden gone,
A convict with a Sharpie and a predator with a crown,
And a cult in red hats cheerin' as it all burns down —
Fuck their opinions, they been wrong all along,
Pour another one, boys, it's a dumpster fire song.
[Verse 2]
Hegseth put the strike plans in a Signal chat,
Looped in a reporter, said "nothin' to see in that,"
Bondi said the list was sittin' on her desk,
Then the DOJ said "there's no list" — well, I guess.
Musk brought a chainsaw to the federal floor,
Gutted USAID, then they brawled and he walked out the door,
Fired the lady countin' jobs 'cause the numbers looked bad,
Tried to fire the Fed when the rates made him mad.
[Verse 3]
Four-hundred-million-dollar jet, a gift from Qatar,
A memecoin dinner if you held the most so far,
Trump Mobile, TrumpRx, a Bible, a shoe,
A watch, a guitar, and a mugshot mug too,
Took the Kennedy Center, hung his name on the wall,
Begs for a Nobel every time he takes a call,
Pardoned a crypto boss, pardoned Santos, pardoned friends —
The pen's for sale, boys, and the sale never ends.
[Chorus]
It's a gold-plated dumpster fire burnin' on the lawn,
A ballroom where the East Wing was, Rose Garden gone,
A convict with a Sharpie and a predator with a crown,
And a cult in red hats cheerin' as it all burns down —
Fuck their opinions, they been wrong all along,
Pour another one, boys, it's a dumpster fire song.
[Verse 4]
Alligator Alcatraz in the Everglades heat,
ICE in the Home Depot lot, Guard on the Chicago street,
Shipped a man to a Salvador cell — "administrative mistake,"
Masked men in Minneapolis and the names they won't say.
Forty-three days of shutdown, SNAP cut off,
Medicaid in the big beautiful bill got chopped,
Tariffs on a Tuesday, Liberation Day,
Markets tanked, he chickened out — TACO all the way.
[Bridge]
He said he could shoot a man on Fifth Avenue
And not lose a single vote — and goddamn, it's true.
They'd drink the Kool-Aid, call it holy wine,
Sixty-dollar Bible and a "Trump 2028" sign,
Third term, fourth term, "we'll see," he grins,
And the cult says amen to whatever he spins.
[Final Chorus]
It's a gold-plated dumpster fire burnin' on the lawn,
A ballroom where the East Wing was, Rose Garden gone,
A convict with a Sharpie and a predator with a crown,
And a cult in red hats cheerin' as it all burns down —
Fuck their opinions, they been wrong all along,
Pour another one, boys — the whole country's the song.
[Outro]
Comey indicted, James indicted, Bolton too,
The enemies list ain't a list, it's a to-do,
Kimmel got yanked when the FCC leaned in,
And the dumpster's still burnin' — red, white, and grin.
